Breathe....breathe.....

My case write up has been robbed, I'm so frustrated.
Calm down......calm down.......
Take a deep breath.........
Breathe..........breathe..........

(",)

I was so happy for the past 1 month.

Nice joke from Badawi to Us

Have a good laugh!

How much would it cost to (telephone) call Malaysia from Hell? You'd be surprised!

Queen Elizabeth, Bill Clinton and Ahmad Badawi died and go to hell. But
the devil has only one phone there. Queen says, I miss my England , can I
use your phone and hear how my people are doing down there.

She calls and talks about five minutes. Then she asks:
Well devil, how much do I owe you for the call? The devil says: Five million pounds.
She writes him a cheque and goes back to her chair .

Clinton wants to make a call too. He says I wanna call the US . He talks about ten minutes,
then asks how much do I owe you devil? The devil says Ten million dollars.
He also writes a cheque and goes back to his seat

Badawi is jealous. He says I want to call Malaysia. He calls and talks for about an hour to his
son-in-law who is busy trying to find Mr.Petronas. Then he asks the devil how much
do I owe you?

The devil replies: only one dollar. Badawi is shocked and asks 'why so little?'.

The devils says: if you make a call from one hell to another, IT'S LOCAL CALL.

FIND THE MAN IN THE COFFEE BEANS

FIND THE MAN IN THE COFFEE BEANS :
after you find the guy -- it's so obvious. Once you find him -- it's embarrassing, and you think, Why didn't I see him immediately?

Time yourself - START NOW on how long u need to find the man in the beans



Doctors have concluded that if you find the man in the coffee beans in 3 seconds, the right half of your brain is better developed than most people. If you find the man betwee n 3 seconds and 1 minute, the right half of the brain is developed normally. If you find the man between 1 minute and 3 minutes, then the right half of your brain is functioning slowly and you need to eat more protein. If you have not found the man after 3 minutes, the advice is to look for more of this type of exercise to make that part of the brain stronger!!!

And, yes, the man is really there!

Missing Rooster

The priest in a small Irish village was very fond of the chickens he kept in the hen house out the back of the parish. He had a cock rooster and about ten hens.

One Saturday night the cock rooster went missing, and as that was the time he suspected cock fights occurred in the village, he decided to do something about it at church the next morning.

At mass he asked the congregation 'Has anybody got a cock'?-----all the men stood up.

'No No' he said 'That wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen a cock?'----all the women stood up.

'NO NO' he said 'that wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen a cock that doesn't belong to them?'-----half the women stood up.

'NO NO' he said 'That wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen my cock?'----all the nuns stood up.

Sweet Joke

There once was a man who had only one testicle, and whose given
name was 'Onestone'. He hated that name and asked everyone not to call
him Onestone.

After years and years of torment, Onestone finally cracked and
said,'If anyone calls me Onestone again I will kill them!'

The word got around and nobody called him that any more.

Then one day a young woman named Blue Bird forgot and said, 'Good
morning, Onestone.' He jumped up, grabbed her and took her deep into
the forest where he made love to her all day and all night. He made
love to her all the next
day, until Blue Bird died from exhaustion.

The word got around that Onestone meant what he promised he would do.

Years went by and no one dared call him by his given name until a
woman named Yellow Bird returned to the village after being away.
Yellow Bird, who was Blue Bird's cousin, was overjoyed when she saw
Onestone. She hugged him
and said, 'Good to see you, Onestone.'

Onestone grabbed her, took her deep into the forest, then he made love
to her all day, made love to her all night, made love to her all the
next day, made love to her all the next night, but Yellow Bird
wouldn't die!

What is the moral of this story?............

OH, come on...take a guess!

Think about it

(You're going to love this!)

And the moral is.

You can't kill two birds with one stone!!